About me
Hi, my name is Fabian, and I hope that everything I write blesses you. I am not even sure how I should start this “about me.” I can tell you that I am grateful for everything that I have been through in my life. Every positive and negative thing I have experienced in my life has led me to become the person I am today. I thank God for everything because I believe in my heart that God is the one who has led me here.
When I first began looking for God, I did not really know much, although I thought I knew God. But as time passed and my desire to know the truth grew, the lies that I once believed (the lies that made me afraid of God) began to fall away. The more I searched the more I learned. The things I write about on this blog are those things that I believe God reveals to us all (when we desire to know more).
The Following Added (05/27/2024):
I often get asked why I interpret the scriptures the way I do. So, I thought I would share my testimony. I hope what I share with you today blesses you as much as it has blessed me.
My testimony:
Like many people, I first started seeking Christ when I hit the lowest point in my life(after losing my family and many other difficult hardships). And at the beginning of this new chapter in my journey, I lived in fear. I was afraid because of all the mistakes I had made previously in my life, and I used to think God would not forgive me if I made another mistake. And when I say I was afraid, I mean I was living in constant terror. Those days were very difficult for me, with a lot of tears and heartache. In those days, I was so careful with everything I did, thinking any mistake I would make would completely separate me from God; it was like I was walking on eggshells.
Back in those days, when I would read the scriptures, I would find myself struggling to understand the things that were written because they did not make sense to me: how an all-loving God could punish people. To try and find peace, I would go from one church to another, seeking guidance from pastors and other believers, but no matter how much they tried to help me, my fears would not go away. I also spent a lot of time seeking help from YouTube videos, but it didn’t help that most people on YouTube were teaching a doctrine of doom and gloom(“God will send you to hell”). Also, whenever anyone would teach about the blasphemy of the Holy Spirit, I would spiral down into a pool of negative thoughts, thinking to myself, “Oh no! I just blasphemed.” It was the worst feeling.
I was so afraid that I prayed (in tears, asking with all my heart) to God to please help me, teach me, and give me understanding. This is when everything began to change for me.
One night, I had a vivid dream(which I believe was from God). I won’t share the details of the dream, but the dream revealed to me that I was afraid because I did not understand the meaning of the scriptures and that I was chasing after man to teach me and not God. When I woke up, I made a promise to God that I would no longer chase after others to teach me but would put all my faith in God to teach me.
Mat 7:8 For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened.
So, I began to study for myself (trusting God to teach me); as I studied, I began to see connections between the scriptures that I had not seen before, and the more I studied, the more things began to make sense. As things began to make sense, I noticed my fears began to fall away.
John 8:31-32 Then said Jesus to those Jews which believed on him, If ye continue in my word, then are ye my disciples indeed; And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.
I now know that God has answered my prayers, and the revelations he has given me have changed my life and who I am, I have been made new. I no longer live in fear.
The biggest revelations came when I began to understand that it is the Spirit that gives life, and not the letter (2Cor3:6). Once I truly understood this, and understood that everything in scripture is about something taking place within you (the kingdom of God is within you), I began to see the scriptures differently, and they began to make sense. It was like the books had become open, and the meanings had become clear. I now know that the stories in the scripture are not meant to be looked at from a literal/ historical perspective but spiritually as something that takes place within you.
I will give an example: in the Old Testament, it says the LORD commanded that the children of Israel destroy the other tribes, their wives, and their children. From a literal perspective, this sounds like genocide, and it sounds scary. But when you understand that this is something spiritual taking place within you, it changes everything. It goes from a story about a scary God who is out to destroy sinners to a story of an all-loving God (who lives within you) who is out to destroy the sin within you: the negativity, the fears, the lies that say that you are not good enough, and the biggest sin the belief that God is separate from you (Sin means to miss the mark; to fail to understand). You are the temple of God, and according to the scripture, the Spirit of God lives within you (1Cor3:16). When the LORD commanded to destroy the other tribes, He is saying spiritually, “Go and destroy those other beliefs (the false ones) that you are holding on to, destroy those lies that you have been married to your whole life and the offspring that were born from those lies.”
The lesson hidden in the scriptures is that everything written in the Bible occurs within us and not outside us. I know this may be hard for many to understand because we are sensual beings and are influenced by our external senses (sight, touch, smell, taste, and hearing). So, when we look at the scriptures, we relate them to our external experiences, senses, and perceptions, which results in us believing that the scriptures have to refer to lessons related to our external real-life world. But what if that is not the case? What if this is not how we are meant to see the scriptures?
John 17:16 They are not of the world, even as I am not of the world.
John 18:36 Jesus answered, My Kingdom is not of this world: if my Kingdom were of this world, then would my servants fight, that I should not be delivered to the Jews: but now is my Kingdom not from hence.
Jesus said his kingdom is not of this world, which is him saying that he is not of the real-life world. His Kingdom is a place that we cannot see physically with our eyes. According to scripture, his Kingdom is found within you.
Luk 17:21 Neither shall they say, Lo here! Or, lo there! for, behold, the Kingdom of God is within you.
Before, when I looked at the scriptures literally, I would notice a lot of things that I considered contradictions, but now, when I see them spiritually, I realize there are no contradictions, and everything in scripture is exactly how it was meant to be.
People always tell me that I am mistaken and that I must see the scriptures literally, and I am ok with people saying that. I know how difficult it is to see this and to let go of the literal interpretation. It was a very difficult battle for me to accept this as well. I had to go through a major internal battle to accept. It was the biggest battle of my life. It is the hardest thing to let go of a belief that you have held onto your whole life as the hope of your salvation. At first, I thought I was blaspheming and asked God in tears to forgive me if I was mistaken. But in the end, God always wins, and his word never returns void; it always accomplishes what it sets out to do.
I am grateful to God for all that he has given me and for all the battles I went through; they made me who I am today. I no longer live in fear, and I know there is no more condemnation.
Rom 8:1 There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit.
A quick example of what it means to see the Spirit or the Spirit of the story can be seen in the story of the Little Engine That Could. This story is about a big engine that breaks down and a little engine that is sent to pull the big engine over a mountain. As the little engine pulled, he kept telling himself: “I think I can, I think I can, I think I can.”
2Co 3:6 Who also hath made us able ministers of the new testament; not of the letter, but of the spirit: for the letter killeth, but the spirit giveth life.
According to 2 Corinthians 3:6, it is the spirit that gives life and not the letter because the letter killeth. Meaning, that the literal interpretation prevents us from seeing the spirit of the story. If we look at the scriptures literally we will get a literal interpretation (that which is born of the flesh is flesh), but if we look at them spiritually we will get a spiritual interpretation (that which is born of the Spirit is spirit).
Joh 3:6 That which is born of the flesh is flesh; and that which is born of the Spirit is spirit.
In the story of the Little Engine That Could, the letter (the flesh) of the story is about the broken down big engine being pulled up the mountain by a little engine. This is how most of us read the Bible. We look at the stories at face value and believe that the lessons are literal. But the true lesson in the story of the Little Engine That Could, the spirit of the story, is about believing in yourself, “I think I can, I think I can, I think I can.” As in the story of the little engine that could, the Bible is also meant to be seen spiritually. This is where most of us struggle because we want to focus on the letter (the literal). But when the time comes, and you are left alone (you as Jacob) to wrestle with the angel of the Lord (the message) and overcome, everything will change, and you will know why all things are possible with God.
God bless you always,
-Fabian
